If you follow the news coming from Belize there is more often than not a story about some one being shot, killed, bombed—the more sensational the more likely it will gain some serious press. Take today’s story about an attempted robbery in Belmopan. The setup is a business man exists his car only to be stopped and robbed of his 30K deposit by a machete (pronounced maah-chet NOT maa-chett-ee). The sword wielding robber did not get far, however before the business man opened fire and a stander by came to his aid. Eventually they caught up to the robber, and he was shot in the groin, fracturing his hip. What makes this particular story worth reporting are the hilarious details of the story. Take this quote from the hero for example:

“I saw a guy running out with a machete from the Atlantic Bank and then there was a chiney man behind busting up shots and then instant when I saw that I knew a robbery was taking place. So instant I moved in and when I moved in, I went ahead of the guy. And when I went ahead of the guy, I just intercepted with him and started to move in on him because I saw they were chasing him. So I started to track him down through the bushes and thing and I saw the man. I caged him in some bushes by A&R and then I let the chiney man come, same time I hollered for the chiney man, and the chiney man met him there and he bust a couple shots in there and caught the man, he shot him in the hip side.”

This is perhaps, the funniest account of a shooting I have read this year. Only topped perhaps by the our hero’s final remarks:

“Yes I could have gotten hurt but I was just brave as usual. I could have gotten a lot of hurt but I am just a brave man. I just want the Chiney man know that I need a little something too because right now my life is in danger still because I don’t know who were with those guys and what they have for me so I don’t know what will take place yet.”

Ah yes, nothing is free anymore, not even being a good Samaritan.

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